she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
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