think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
and she was petting her beer can
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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