Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
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