If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I party with great urgency now.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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