They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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