do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize