As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Are my feet made of real feet?
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
