you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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