Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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