Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
