I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
