You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
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First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
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Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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