even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
