Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize
