i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably