Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
They took my balls.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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