singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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