I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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