im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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