oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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