so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
