Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize