The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Never let your siblings swipe right.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
