I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
