he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
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