I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
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