Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize