So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
