worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
