I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
there is glitter all over my balls
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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