Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
