She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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