Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
