there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
