Dual....:-)
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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