I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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