You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize