you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
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swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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