She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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