how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
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i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
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I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I am mentally ready for anal.
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