i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
