David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
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