I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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