New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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