Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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