I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Randomize
