Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize