I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Randomize