One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
