you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But theres a keg here and me gusta
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize